Alice Blog

Can’t Get Over Him

Thanks for always being here for all your readers with great advice! This past summer, the summer between my sophomore and junior years of college, I studied abroad in London. It was the best two months of my life. I made so many new friends and had my first experience with a guy. The past two years of college were good for me, but not great, and now was the first time in my life when I actually had a group of friends, and it felt amazing. I was so depressed to come back home, and none of us ever wanted to leave. London is all I think about, and I can’t stop thinking that we’ll never be like that again. It makes me so sad, but I feel like I’m living in the past, and I can’t let go. Also, this guy that I was hooking up with in London (first time I’ve ever been with a guy), I got really emotionally attached to, but he has been/is with so many girls, but still I can’t get over him. We haven’t spoken since July, and when I saw him here at school, he smiled, but we didn’t talk. I know that I don’t mean anything to him, but I still can’t get over it because I automatically connect him to the thought of being in London, and it’s hard for me to let it go.. I don’t know what to do.. 

Phyllis replied:

You had a great time, made good friends, had an intimate relationship that was all new for you, and now you can’t stop thinking about it–normal, normal, normal.  That may not help much, but you have learned how to share your feelings with a close bunch of friends and experience intimacy and deep feelings for a guy.  All of which proves that it can happen again. And again.  It will never be just like London, and it may not be happening at the same time—close friends,  intimate relationship, brand new city to explore–but look at it as the first of many good adventures .  The best thing about an experience like this is that you now have something with which to measure all future relationships.  It will help you sort out phoniness in friends, controlling behavior in a boyfriend, and has given you a feeling of self worth–you deserve to have friends you can trust and a boyfriend who is considerate.  Lucky, lucky you.

I’ve read every book

Question:

I read my first Alice book in the public library at age 10, and I just finished Alice on Board this afternoon, so I’m completely caught up. I turned 30 two weeks ago. 🙂 Alice was a friend throughout my childhood and teen years, and every couple of years I request the last 2-3 books all at one shot just to see what going on with her, and I’ve never been disappointed. I’m glad she’s still with Patrick in a non-codependent way that works for both of them, vaguely philosophical about Lester EVER finding the right girl for him, slightly disappointed about William & Mary for Alice, but hoping she’ll be happy in College Park. (When did Liz get off the Bennington wait list? I must have skipped over that somehow – but good for her!) Very excited to read Always Alice – next year will be here before we know it! 🙂

After having read every book, the one scene that still sticks with me most out of every single one of them is the Passing By arc from Alice In-Between. I still remember reading that scene for the first time as a highschooler, standing in the checkout line with my mother at the grocery store – I was supposed to help carry the bags out to the car, but I was bawling just as Alice was after she stood up in class and the wrong poem came out of her mouth. I’ll always remember Ms Summers’ reaction to the situation — “sometimes a poem can move us in ways we didn’t expect”. It’s been at least a dozen, if not fifteen, years since I first read that scene, but it plays out in my head like a movie. Ms Summers’ calm, measured thoughtfulness and immensely respectful reaction to Alice’s moment was the exact compass the rest of the class needed to know how they should react themselves, and she absolutely could not have hit any harder of a homerun as a educator and a human being.

Sometimes moments in literature stick with us in ways that nobody would ever expect. 🙂 This series may merely be “silly fluffy YA novels” to some, but I will always carry that moment with me, and I thought you might like to know about that.

Phyllis replied:

I don’t know that the Alice series has ever been considered silly YA fluff, but it’s great to know that the books have meant so much to you.  It would be wonderful, after the final book is published next year, to know of readers’ very favorite moments in Alice’s life.  Thanks so much for sharing yours.

Alice contracts

Question:

 Are you under contract to write x number of books for the Alice series? Did you decide way in advance how many books you would be writing and then make a deal to follow through? Do you ever feel like you’re writing about Alice because you have to and that you really would like to stop or take a break for awhile, but can’t, due to prearranged deadlines? Basically, what I’m asking has to do with obligation versus desire. I’ve always been interested in how writers focus a series around a pivotal character for an extended length of time. I know so many who do and it’s something I’ve thought about myself, yet I’ve wondered if I could sustain an interesting plot and character development for all those pages.  I respect and admire you and your books have been invaluable not just to my childhood, but to my life as a reader.

Phyllis replied:

When my editor and I decided many years ago that I would extend the first Alice book into a series, it was all very much up in the air.  I agreed to do it as long as I did not have to write more than one book per year, and that Alice could get older in each book, so I wouldn’t feel as though I were stuck in a sitcom.  Somewhere along the way I told my readers that there would be 28 books (about three books for every year of Alice’s life up until age 18.  And the final book would take her from 18 to 60).  The publisher gave me a contract for about three or five Alice books at a time.  Usually I felt quite excited when it was time to start another book, and had a general idea of what would be in it.  As she grew older, of course, her interests became more sophisticated, and some people (usually parents) tried to ban one or more of the Alice books in their children’s school.  Once in a while they succeeded, but usually schools and libraries went to bat for me.  The more books I wrote, however, the more letters I received.  Most readers loved the series just as they were, but some readers wanted Alice to live in another country for awhile; some wanted to know why she and her friends never tried drugs; wanted her to do more community service projects; wanted her to learn Spanish, to have more pets, play an instrument, play sports, etc. etc. and I simply had to focus on the girl I had created and try my best to keep it  honest.

Do You Read Your Reviews?

Question:

Credit Card Argument

Question:

Phyllis replied:

I think  you have a good argument, and in general I agree that it’s a good idea to begin building your credit.  I don’t know you, however, so don’t know if your parents have cause to worry about what might happen if you have a credit card. But I also feel that young people need to learn from their own mistakes.  If you can trust yourself to only put gas on your card, and you are positive you have enough to cover that by alwayspaying the full amount, and never needing to pay interest, then I think  you should be allowed to try it.  Perhaps you could simply go ahead and get the card, then tell your parents after the fact.  Let them in on your decision and even show them your bank statement from time to time to let them know you are responsible.

Homosexual Love

Question

A Poem for your husband’s passing

Question:

A Certain Loss, a Special Find   by Angelique Clark

It’s not the way his story’s told

or how he went from young to old.

The man you’ve lost is not a name,

he’s not a stranger in a frame.

You knew him, and he knew you,

You know him, and he knows you.

Heaven is far, but your heart is near,

he is gone…but he’s still here.

 I hope you like it.  I’m a writer, and while I was finishing up a story somewhwat like the Alice books, I remembered you.

Phyllis replied:

Thank you.  Since you gave your OK for me to print your name, I felt I ought to use it here, since

the poem is your property and you need to receive credit.  I appreciate the sentiment.

Always Alice

Question:

Hi! I love your Alice books, they’re really funny and heart-warming. I have some questions. One is: did “Always Alice” come out? Another is: What age is suitable to read “Always Alice”? The last one is: Can you make another movie on any of the Alice books? Hope you reply, and thanks for writing all those entertaining Alice books for us to read!
      

Phyllis replied:

Always Alice, the very last book in the Alice series, will be published in the fall of 2013.   If you are old

enough to read the books about Alice in her senior year of high school, I think you are old enough to

read Always Alice.  I don’t know if another movie will be made of Alice or not.  The producers who made

“Alice Upside Down” own all the movie rights.

Why did you write it?

Question:

I’ve been reading the Alice books since third grade and they were always fun to read. But now I’m a sophmore in high school and I’m reading Incredibly Alice and It’s frustrating me to no end. Firstly, why did you write it so Jill and Justin get married like that and like NO ONE thought twice about it and were almost encouraging Jill’s golddigging. Last year I had a friend who got pregnant in her senior year, and we were happy for her, but we were still concerned about her future and she certainly wasn’t bragging about it to everyone. Secondly, why did you put the part about the labia? I mean really?! I feel like its just trying to hard, no teenage girl worries about that. Either way I’m enjoying the book, rushed plot and all.

Phyllis replied:

Because Alice and her friends were not being judgmental does not mean they approved of Jill and Justin’s plan to get her pregnant.  Alice has had problems with Jill’s behavior for several years, but Jill and Justin have also been dating exclusively all that time, and it was their answer to the situation with Justin’s mom, however unwise.  As for the worry about labia, I include in the Alice books things that readers write to me about, and I have had a number of letters about the issue of not feeling “normal” down there, mostly because girls aren’t that familiar with the normal variations in female genitalia.  Boys have it easier in that regard.  They can see every part of a guy’s anatomy in the showers at school, but girls’ female parts are largely hidden, even from themselves.  And if they happen upon some pictures in a porn magazine, they tend to compare themselves with what another girl looks like when she’s really exposed, something you just don’t usually see, not even in the showers.

Is it time to move on?

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