Do You Think I Should Tell Him?

Question:hello well i have a question to ask. i really like this guy so much and i dont know if i should tell him because we both are in band so we spend so much time together and i dont want it to be all akward between us because we are barely starting to talk a lot. im also scared that if we go out and we end up breaking up that things will be like so weird kinda like it is with my ex that is also in band. do you think i should tell him how i truely feel or should i just keep quiet and be really good friends an hope that he feels the same way about me and hopefully asks me out..?

Phyllis replied:

For those of you who have been following this fan mail page for a long time, you probably know by now that my answer is almost always, “Show, don’t tell.” What I mean is, what would you hope to accomplish by saying, “Do you know that I really, really like you?” You’ll put him on the spot, and that will really, really make him uncomfortable. If he ever tells you he likes you and asks how you feel about him, then of course you tell him. Surely you girls know how to flirt, don’t you? You smile, you laugh, you find excuses to sit near him, you might give him a funny card or present. And if he jokingly asks you why you’re being so nice to him, you can honestly say, “Because I like you!” Please girls, you have to give a guy a little warning before you come out with an expression that makes him feel he’s required to give the right answer back. If you show him in a lot of ways that he’s special, he should get the message. And then, if he responds, you’ll know what to do next.

Posted on: June 4, 2009