Losing a boyfriend

Hi. I just need some advice from a wise woman like you. I’m in college and my boyfriend and I had been together for a while and I was beginning to actually love him and I thought things were going good but he broke up with me to be with another girl. My heart feels shattered and it’s definitely hard because I have to see them together all the time and have to hear people talk about them and I feel depressed, Angry, jealous, and sick to my stomach and I hate it. I’ve tried putting on a smile and being friends with them but gave up because I can’t help but feel sick and jealous and sad. There are times when I want revenge and to do something that will hurt them especially her but I don’t want to be that person people hate. I especially don’t know how to get over someone who I gave my virginity to because for a woman, that is your most prized possession. What if we someday get back together? How will I not think he wont do it again? I feel like I’m an emotional rollercoaster and I could really use some advice from a woman who seems to have lived through it all like you. 💓💗

I’m not a professional counselor, so these are only thoughts at the top of my head.  It’s true that having sexual intercourse with someone is about as physical as you can get, but it’s not necessarily the closest emotionally that you can ever feel for someone.  People can go their whole lives having sex with different persons but without feeling a deep love and closeness with anybody.  You had said that you were beginning to actually love him, but you probably still had some way to go to feel that both you and he were deeply, emotionally committed.  I do understand completely how sad and upset and  anxious you feel about seeing him with someone else, but please don’t put too much emphasis on having “given him your virginity,” because yes, that is special, but I don’t think it ranks way up there with feeling so close to someone that you feel you could share every single thing you ever thought or did or wanted to do, and that he would understand.  There is no guarantee that anyone, even a “soulmate,” (and I’m not even sure what that is), would never leave you, just as you could never promise with absolute certainly that you would never leave him–things happen–lives change–but you are going to meet many other men in your life, and you have much to give.